Out of sight - out of mind?

One thing I have discovered about myself over the years is that I have a tendancy with most people and things to have an "out of sight - out of mind" attitude. Actually, attitude is the wrong word totally but right now the correct word escapes me. But what I mean is this.
Its not like i don't care, or like i don't feel anything for the person, or that i don't know that the "thing" is still there, its just somehow i seem to automatically filter information. It might be some kind of internal mechanism to avoid getting stress, which I have found that I can suffer from if I allow it.

Multitasking is really not my middle name as some people know already. I have found in fact that the more things I have to think about the less my brain can cope with it, to the point where I cannot even focus on one of those things, and therefore I become totally unproductive. So my daily fight is to make sure that I only allow myself to think about one thing at a time, and to do one thing at a time. If I fail at this, nothing at all gets done, I just end up spinning plates and all of them crash to the floor.

I think its something similar with friends. I notice that with a lot of people, friendships come with a lot of obligations - remembering birthdays, anniversaries, going to visit all of them at every opportunity. Even if you don't want to. Its like the fear of skipping one of those things will leave you rejected for ever by that friend. Of course its good to remember birthdays and things like that, but trouble is the older you get, the more friends you have and the more birthdays etc to remember, and the more plates you end up spinning. Someday one plate crashes to the ground and you think your friend will hate you forever. This is great news! If they hate you forever, its one less plate to spin, and they weren't really a good friend after all. If they don't hate you, they'll likely forgive you and dropping the plate just didn't matter at all. That's a real friend. I have dropped lots of plates. I have a lot of real friends.

That's not the entirety of what i wanted to say. Its just the preface. Rather this. I'm terrible at remembering birthdays and everyone knows that, but if they don't, here it is again I'M TERRIBLE AT REMEMBERING BIRTHDAYS. Yet the friendships I hold tend to be those which cross all obligatory limits. If i don't see them or email them for years, or forget birthdays its no big deal. Of course I try not to forget but I usually fail. We may meet sometime, and its just like we were chatting yesterday. Its all really chilled, stress free, and its great. But in between those times I have to say that I rarely think about them, and i don't really miss them. Oddly, I'm a very deeply emotional person, but i think if i missed everyone really badly I'd be a permanent nervous wreck. I call this a blessing, a protection system of some kind. EXCEPT that I have experienced this same phenomenon with girlfriends. That's bad. Very bad. Very bad indeed. Sooner or later, I'd get asked "so did you miss me while i was away?" or something similar. I'm a very honest person, but how do you answer a question like that honestly but without causing World War III? or is it IV now? You can't, you're really in the doghouse and there's not much you can do about it!

English proverbs, weird and wonderful.
Too many cooks spoil the broth
but
Many hands make light work
and
Out of sight, out of mind
but
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
yet this time, right now
"Out of sight, out of mind"
is both out of sight and out of mind
Absence makes the heart grow fonder