The plane sat a while on the runway before a slot was available for us to take-off. During that time I fell asleep. I woke just as the plane began to move again. I'm so tired. As of now I have been awake essentially for over 21hrs straight and travelling for at least 11 of those hours. With tiredness comes a definite change as I begin to battle against memories. Memories of all kinds, along with plenty of “what if” type questions. Even before I boarded the flight and was wandering through the terminal I could sense temptations beginning to well up within me, temptations to return to old vices for comfort. There's an adrenaline rush that accompanies those temptations, and it feels good. It's not good at all, but it feels good, and i guess that's why we humans stumble so often. I resisted entertaining such thoughts but I recognised that they are there (for the first time since our relationship had started) and I am at war.
By the time I reach home I will have been awake for a full 33hrs straight. That's unless I can change my ferry ticket for an earlier one. I'm certainly going to try as a 5hr stop in Helsinki does not appeal AT ALL.
Showing posts with label planes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label planes. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Ghosts
So I'm in the airport sat in the lounge by gate 24. I don't know what's up with my phone. Just like it was the whole trip, it still won't give me a network, yet on the way there it did. Very annoying! It makes me nervous, as I may need to make a call soon, and if it doesn't work there it could be a problem.
I successfully escaped talking to anyone on the flight, and strangely I fell asleep whilst watching a second movie. I didn't sleep long, it must have been half an hour maximum, but I slept. We'll see later if such a short sleep is enough to mess up my body clock totally.
On the flight I wrote this. Right now it looks like a poem (which i have been known to write on occasion), but it may become a song sometime.
Ghosts
Spaces where you used to be
now taunting the longings of me
and Pisa doesn't open a bottle
No, Pisa commences the battle
a battle of the mind
where in it I find
its warriors – your ghosts
I'll try not to fear them
but rather endear them
precious
perished
memories
cherished
I successfully escaped talking to anyone on the flight, and strangely I fell asleep whilst watching a second movie. I didn't sleep long, it must have been half an hour maximum, but I slept. We'll see later if such a short sleep is enough to mess up my body clock totally.
On the flight I wrote this. Right now it looks like a poem (which i have been known to write on occasion), but it may become a song sometime.
Ghosts
Spaces where you used to be
now taunting the longings of me
and Pisa doesn't open a bottle
No, Pisa commences the battle
a battle of the mind
where in it I find
its warriors – your ghosts
I'll try not to fear them
but rather endear them
precious
perished
memories
cherished
More freakishness!
We landed and had to wait a while on the runway for a slot so we could go to gate. As we waited I grabbed the in-flight magazine from the seat pocket and began flicking through its pages. As I did so, I stopped at an article named “You Fit Where You Get In”. I don't know what caught my attention exactly, possibly the face of the author. I think he may remind me of someone from my past, but I can't be sure who. I started to read...
I don't really want to rewrite everything he wrote, I'd probably get sued for that. Funny though that reading his article made me happy and excited, when it really should have made me cry. See what I mean about my unpredictable emotions? Anyway, I was so excited about what had happened to me in such a short time that as soon as I was through controls at I called to tell her all about it. Sadly she didn't pick up, and it went to voice-mail. I tried again a little later and still the same.
As I was getting seated on the connecting flight to London, I received a text from a friend saying they all missed me already. That's a nice thought to be leaving with. I too was a little sad that I hadn't got the chance to say a proper goodbye to her two lovely daughters who had added some moments of brightness to my otherwise rather overcast trip.
I'm not feeling great, I can't tell if it's just hot on the plane or if I'm feverish. Because of the change to my flights (I was meant to fly out on a different route, but the flight was cancelled so I'm flying the same route back as I came) I have the unfortunate disadvantage of losing my good seat. Instead I'm in the centre section of a 777. Seat 34F. I'm not looking forward to the long flight, I normally can't sleep on planes at all, and even if I could, in this case it would almost guarantee severe jet-lag – something I can do without..
The people either side of me are Spanish speaking. This could mean little or no conversation for the whole flight, something which usually I'd usually not really want on such a long flight, but on this occasion I'm glad that I probably won't be obliged to converse. That could lead to usually harmless questions which today I don't want to answer. “So why were you on vacation?” “What did you do?” “Did you have a good time?”. There it is again, the need to lie in order to protect the wounded soul. I'd rather not talk at all than have to lie.
Just checked out the movie selection and I'm so glad that The Soloist is there. I missed out on seeing that the other day due to book editing obligations. Settling down to watch, drama begins in the row behind me! Some guy has long legs, obviously too long for the guy in front, who is demanding the man find another seat as his knees are in the other guy's back. While I sympathise with the guy in front, his attitude stinks. I sympathise with the guy behind as I know what its like to have long legs on a cramped flight. People....
We had a period of really bad turbulence where the plane actually had to slow down a lot, I suspect it may have been as we were passing over the hurricane which hit the North American coast yesterday.
More drama. The captain made an announcement to ask if there were any doctors on board, as they had a medical emergency with one of the passengers. Like something from a movie.
The movie (The Soloist) was great, very thought provoking and I can relate to it well. If you haven't seen it, I recommend it highly. Signing off for now, more when I land.
I don't really want to rewrite everything he wrote, I'd probably get sued for that. Funny though that reading his article made me happy and excited, when it really should have made me cry. See what I mean about my unpredictable emotions? Anyway, I was so excited about what had happened to me in such a short time that as soon as I was through controls at I called to tell her all about it. Sadly she didn't pick up, and it went to voice-mail. I tried again a little later and still the same.
As I was getting seated on the connecting flight to London, I received a text from a friend saying they all missed me already. That's a nice thought to be leaving with. I too was a little sad that I hadn't got the chance to say a proper goodbye to her two lovely daughters who had added some moments of brightness to my otherwise rather overcast trip.
I'm not feeling great, I can't tell if it's just hot on the plane or if I'm feverish. Because of the change to my flights (I was meant to fly out on a different route, but the flight was cancelled so I'm flying the same route back as I came) I have the unfortunate disadvantage of losing my good seat. Instead I'm in the centre section of a 777. Seat 34F. I'm not looking forward to the long flight, I normally can't sleep on planes at all, and even if I could, in this case it would almost guarantee severe jet-lag – something I can do without..
The people either side of me are Spanish speaking. This could mean little or no conversation for the whole flight, something which usually I'd usually not really want on such a long flight, but on this occasion I'm glad that I probably won't be obliged to converse. That could lead to usually harmless questions which today I don't want to answer. “So why were you on vacation?” “What did you do?” “Did you have a good time?”. There it is again, the need to lie in order to protect the wounded soul. I'd rather not talk at all than have to lie.
Just checked out the movie selection and I'm so glad that The Soloist is there. I missed out on seeing that the other day due to book editing obligations. Settling down to watch, drama begins in the row behind me! Some guy has long legs, obviously too long for the guy in front, who is demanding the man find another seat as his knees are in the other guy's back. While I sympathise with the guy in front, his attitude stinks. I sympathise with the guy behind as I know what its like to have long legs on a cramped flight. People....
We had a period of really bad turbulence where the plane actually had to slow down a lot, I suspect it may have been as we were passing over the hurricane which hit the North American coast yesterday.
More drama. The captain made an announcement to ask if there were any doctors on board, as they had a medical emergency with one of the passengers. Like something from a movie.
The movie (The Soloist) was great, very thought provoking and I can relate to it well. If you haven't seen it, I recommend it highly. Signing off for now, more when I land.
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